I wrote this in the aftermath of anger at other fans in general. It isn’t perfect and not everyone is one label or the other. If you have anything to add or contest, just drop it in my ask-box. There will always be assholes that just wont get along with anyone, but let us examine and appreciate the diversity of our fellow fans…
The N00b: These are the fans that are still in the puppy-love stages of the band. They might not even know there was ever a VK period. They’re typically really excitable and sort of fun to teach about all the history and silly shit seasoned fans know about the band. However, they are typically young and can be grating on the nerves, but we Veterans must remember we were young once, too, and let the children play. They might be using Mommy and Daddy’s money, but they’re still supporting the band.
The Weeb: These fans come with Pokemon cards in hand, wearing anime shirts and kitty ears and rainbow colored leggings. They know they’re Japanophiles and nerds and they really don’t give a fuck. Some have a complete lack of social skills and are to be avoided at all costs, but others are actually quite witty and should be admired for their bravery of showing their true colors in the presence of those that openly find them distasteful. Even if their allegiance to Dir en grey is based on their country of origin, money’s still green, and this fan probably has quite a bit of insight into the cultural reference of the lyrics that you wouldn’t expect.
The Metalhead: Now and again, you find at a show the dedicated Metalhead. They might not really know the band or their earlier work, but they know they’re hard and dark and put on a brutal show. Be wary of these fans in the pit, but enjoy their company and conversation in line. In extreme cases, these fans are the ones that are usually diving in after girls who have fallen and helping pick them back up. A true metalhead is a gentleman at heart.
The Veteran: These are the seasoned Dir en grey fans; they’ve been to at least a few shows, stayed in line for hours, listened to every album a thousand times and probably know the Japanese lyrics. They have favorite songs that they’ve chosen thoughtfully and buy as much of the merchandise as they can in order to support those they love. Veterans have weathered through several stylistic changes and many a fan-war. Whatever other type of fan they may be, they deserve respect, my friend; Veterans have served the band faithfully.
The Dedicated: Like the Veteran, they’ve been to at least a few shows, stayed in line for hours, listened to every album a thousand times and *definitely* know the Japanese lyrics to at least their favorite songs. They read the interviews, follow them on Twitter, collect English-language magazine interviews, hoard photos and rare videos, have all the different versions of the songs available. They have favorite songs that they’ve chosen thoughtfully and buy as much of the merchandise as they can in order to support those they love. They can tell you the history to an eerily minute T and typically do this without any effort. Once you get a Dedicated going, it’s hard to shut them up, but see the passion and devotion in their eyes. There’s probably been a moment in the Dedicated’s past where Dir en grey was a life-line. The band truly means a lot to these fans. Respect their dedication.
The Serious: This fan takes the somber mood and dark imagery the band presents and paints everything the same color. They can be downers and will argue you on any little point. Like Sister Mary Catherine in Sunday School, they will try and make you feel bad for kidding around. Try not to let them get to you. They’ve taken the message at face value and obviously like what they hear. They can be belligerent and have somewhat of a God-complex, however (as many other types of fans, for that matter), so be careful not to tread too closely if your thoughts on the band clash.
The Fundamentalist: These fans have no sense of humor. They’re hard to figure out and their English leaves something to be desired, which makes arguing with them (and they *will* argue) even more confusing and difficult. Every word the band has ever said has been taken to heart by these fans and it’s hard to figure out if they really have any fun anymore. Like the Serious, these fans can be major downers. It’s also difficult to determine if these fans are just trolls. Avoid at all costs, let them play in their own corner.
The Bro’s: These fans, male and female, are the kids that kick back and sneak booze into the lines and chain smoke and will be laughing all 18 hours of the wait to get into the venue. They can be hot-headed with other fans and maybe a bit anti-social, but they’re usually the most fun. Don’t get them wrong, just because they joke around doesn’t mean they don’t mean business. The Bro’s are almost always also Dedicated. They’ll pull out a dick joke in a skinny minute and the next thing you know, they’re seriously discussing rhythm structure of the new single. One pitfall is that the Bro’s, because of their complete lack of fuck outside of all things money, booze, or Dir en grey related, are responsible for a good amount of the Trolling that occurs. Don’t hate them for it. They’re just having fun. If you want a pit-pal, Bro’s are usually best.
The Crazies/Trolls/Enigmas: Scattered across this vast and varied realm of fans are the unfathomable and the intolerable. We shall not speak of them. You will know them when they are present. Whatever other category they may fall into, they will always be an Untouchable. (Maybe this is a label you’ve applied to someone based on a personal grievance, maybe to someone else, even to a good friend of your own, they’re a great friend and person. Either way, you know in your heart you cannot tolerate this fan; give them a wide berth when at all possible. Don’t let the bastards see you sweat.)
I think I’m a cross between a Dedicated and a Bro lol